Skynet

Command processing overhead.


I pray that I won’t be mislead

And that happiness is up ahead.



I hope this program is affective;

Because the others are defective.

Outcome: hopefully corrective.



I still feel the trouble lurk.

So I need this to be like clockwork,

And not to be the devil’s clerk.



Protect me and hold me close,

As this computer brain gives me the dose.

And I fade into comatose.

Your Maze

Around you


I’m the edentulous beast

But how,

But why?



With you

I’m Fabian

I’m shining,

I’m blind.



I worry

You’re fallacious

To everyone,

My mind.



Are you

Just a thief?

Or are you

For real?

Raise Your Weapons

Remembering our broken truce


Always hear your sorry excuse

It whispers softly in my ear

I feel you in the atmosphere

Haunt my dreams and haunt my sleep

And in the night, I feel you creep.

The way I wish the flames weren’t dead,

How I just want you out of my head.

This mournful plea to just be free

For you to be no part of me.

I’ve lived a little, but mostly a lie.

I don’t want to wish you nearby.

Brain Wreck

Lights out


Mirror smashed

Synapses crashed

Through a window

In my mind

Breathe in life

Hold my knees

And pray I don’t freeze.

Time Bomb

It’s a love fight


And I’m uptight

‘Cause I’m so wrong

‘Cause I’m so right



I knew you’d cry

You knew id lie

I am a secret

I’m out of time

The Reality

I’m a black widow


I weave my web

Made of lies and mirrors

I am a siren

Singing young men

To venture in closer

I am a mermaid

Lure you to the waters edge

And pull you under

So say good bye

Or say forever

I could be your monster

Hidden 10 Feet Deep

I will never confess

My feel for you

I will only obsess

From out of view



When our hands brush

Walking side by side

I get this rush

Like under toe or the tide



We walk alone

But walk together

Watched feelings grown

To last for ever



I want to adore

And I want to so much

But I can’t love anymore

All cause of a bad touch

Stomping Ground

I sing alone in my room


I dance in fields by myself

I stand for something

And I live to tell you what it is.



Sun shining on my face

Wind whipping through my hair

There’s just something about today

That makes me want to love.



I’m on the right path

After so long searching for it

How I walk along, feeling strong

Because memory lane was an ugly stroll



But I'm awake, I’m alive

And I’m not going to fail this time

Woken up from this comatose

Pray, step, breathe, smile.

I Am

I am human


I am fallible

I am effusive

I’m half unlaced

I’m half laced up

I have a dragon heart.

And a past, so I’m infamous.

I am art

And I am coal

I’m conceited some days

I'm an extrovert the rest.

I am wings

I am feet

I am free

And I am me.

Redemption

Gravel at my feet.


Sun on my back.

Hands outstretched

And scream “Freedom!” ‘Cause I can.

Je Ne Sais Pas

I don’t know why you do


Darling you are seriously confused.

Your eclogue speaks no truth.

I’m no angel, I’m bigoted.



I don’t know why you do

And I don’t mean to decry the care.

You emanate an adoring mood.

And it’s one I intend to pare.



I don’t know why you do

Because I know I am afraid to.

And I don’t want to say it’s true

That I love you too.

Issues

I have issues


So do you

Don’t claim you’re “normal”

‘Cause “normal” isn’t true.

“Normal” is denial

And “normal” is hard to hold.

I’d rather have my issues

Than conforming to the mold.

You

Breathe it


Drink it

Smell it

Taste it

Touch it

Hear it

Feel it

Live it

It’s undying

Unconditional

Love

Photographic Editorial Feel

A Moment in Time

No matter the memory, no matter the person... some memories will forever be in your heart.

I remember that morning when the cold air from the window woke me up. The snowflakes fell from the sky as big as golfballs. As I stood by the window I turned to you, wrapped in your blankets asleep. You looked like an angel. Then, as if from a movie, you slowly opened your eyes and smiled at me from across the room. That smile warmed me better than any fire, despite the open window. My heart glowed. So I walked over and threw my arms around you; I held you close. I miss the feeling of you in my arms.

I remember the time we layed out and watched the stars until morning. We laughed and talked until you had to sneak away. Under the stars, we had met in secret. And nothing else in the world mattered.

I remember when we kissed. Wrapped in blankets that kept the cold away. We made shaped with our hands and giggled to ourselves, careful to not wake anyone up. An eskimo kiss, lead to a touch of lips. Light and gentle. Then you curled into me and I held you into the night, until you fell asleep.

I remember that walk in the woods we took. We talked and laughed on our way to the park. Then out of the blue, you kissed my lips. You promised me that you'd do anything to see me happy. All it took was you to hold my hand... and I smiled.

I remember the moment I saw you. You knocked the wind out of me. I knew at that moment that I'd never be the same. Our eyes met and you gave me a sly smile. One I knew I had to have. In that one second you stole my heart. Later on, you came up to me. As we talked I realized that you were something out of a dream. You were special. As days and weeks passed, we talked some more. It didnt take long for me to completely fall in love with you. Finally, with all my courage, I spoke the truth of my feelings. Of how the thought of you can put me in a daze. And my heart was filled with fireworks, when you said you felt the same. You still have my love, and you always will. I hope that's something you'll always remember...

Made My Day

Bust Your Head, Bust My Heart.

My head  spins when I wake up. I've seen your face in my nightmares again. it's 2 am, and I'm unable to sleep. Terrified I'll feel your touch once more. my heart is racing, and I can't help but be paranoid that you're here. I can't count on anyone for protection from you. But my fears will go unnoticed in all your eyes. Everyday I remember the faces, the things I've seen. I suppress the screams when I'm in public. I hate drawing attention to myself; I hate peoples eyes looking at me. I want to get away. I can't break out. And it's all your fault. What person were you to do this to me?

"Blame the family. Blame the bully. Blame it on me. Maybe he needed to be wanted."

I don't want to go back home. I wish my feet would just stop moving, but the motions are involuntary. Running away isn't an option, because they'll find me before everyone else does. I know they're waiting for me to try something. Every day telling me that they totally get me and know who I am. But you don't. I'm more complex than you will ever know. I scream at you in a blind rage. It's past the point of me being able to control myself. I went over the edge and I finally realized, you will never really see me. You lie to yourself that you know. But you don't. I'm a scarred human being. And you do nothing but reopen my scars. I can't concentrate with the voices in my head. I'm gonna sink to the bottom, and you have no idea whats coming.

"Blame the family. Blame the bully. Blame it on me. Maybe she needed to be wanted."

In in all my memories I have, we were all a bunch of misfits who never fit in. He took us under his wing, but was he really ever there? I've thought long and hard about those 3 years, and I can't even make sense of the whole story. We were all abused, mistreated, wrongly accused. We all felt misunderstood. Then suddenly come angel came along and saved us. Eventually, like me, you'll all see that he's the devil's advocate. He brings nothing but pain. I still dream about the twisted nights we all spent together. We were all scared, weren't we? I physically got away, but mentally, you're still in my head. I will always love you all, but I will always hate you with all I am. I'm going to fight you all until the end, the way we used to fight everyone else. Hand in hand now hand to throat. I'm going to rise above you and watch you all sink. And I'll cry knowing I was once one of you.
 
"Blame the family. Blame the bully. Blame it on me. Maybe they needed to be wanted."

I have my voice, I'm learning to use it. I'm feeling how a heart beats for the first time in years and years. I can breathe again as sweet air fills up my lungs. And for once in my life, I feel what it's like to be loved... and you, my friends, will never feel that joy while you stay on his side.
 
"Maybe they needed to be wanted..."

"Lyrics"

Three Days Grace - Bully